hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
