I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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