one might say we're banned from that church
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
