I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Help. Why am I so naked?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
