I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
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