this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Randomize
