I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
