Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
