what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
