it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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