Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
