i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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