I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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