I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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