Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
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