god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
