The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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