4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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