just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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