they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
