I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
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