he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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