i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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