Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i may or may not be watching the land before time
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
