"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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