So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
