with your own penis?
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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