Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
