Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
