If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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