You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
