I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
zippers are such a cool invention
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
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