you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
