Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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