Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
