everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
