good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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