I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize