another moral hangover. fuck.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize