Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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