clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
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