help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
