Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
