I wish you could order shots online.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
My life is pants optional.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
