Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Randomize
