Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize