your parents love me but you hate me
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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