im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
