i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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