I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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