I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
