her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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